Deep down, I truly and solemnly want to believe in the goodness of souls.
Deep down, I genuinely want to know that somewhere out there she exists.
That somewhere out there, that one person who understands me, exists.
I want to believe in it so bad, that I am willing to be as delusional as it takes.
I am willing to believe in an illusion.
Deep down, I dream of places and people.
Places of belongingness and people of virtue.
Deep down, I can lie to myself as much as I like,
Because I am allowed to place my own universal rules.
I have given my-own-self the opportunity to be happy,
Because no one else will.
I am grateful for the lies
I am at peace with myself, deep down.